Tuesday, April 29, 2008


I just had to blog..


Sigh.everytime a moment of insurmountable boredom hits me,i feel inclined to blog. Currently in the library,3rd floor.the super-quiet-ppl-cn-hear-u-chew-brings-a-new-understanding-of-pin-drop-silence area.heck even the flip of a page is amplified to the equivalent of a loud laugh on normal floors.turning around to open my bag causes a commotion.argh.the most conducive environment?i think not.its quiet.too quiet...

Its so unsettling that everyone around me are able to move without making a single sound bt i cause heads to turn when i open my coke bottle.n even when i swallow.glug glug glug it goes.

Its just as well that the weather has gone back to dreary.now i wont b distracted by all the pretty colours.this time next week some(if not most) of the londoners will b free from exams.well pah i say.i hope the weather continues to b crap so u guys cnt have fun in the sun.so there.sigh.bck to work..

Enz.xoxo


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Monday, April 28, 2008


isms.

essentialism
The metaphysical theory that the essential properties of an object can be distinguished from those that are accidental to it.

liberalism
A political theory founded on the natural goodness of humans and the autonomy of the individual and favoring civil and political liberties, government by law with the consent of the governed, and protection from arbitrary authority.
existentialism
A philosophy that emphasizes the uniqueness and isolation of the individual experience in a hostile or indifferent universe, regards human existence as unexplainable, and stresses freedom of choice and responsibility for the consequences of one's acts.

positivism
A doctrine contending that sense perceptions are the only admissible basis of human knowledge and precise thought.

dualism
The view that the world consists of or is explicable as two fundamental entities, such as mind and matter.
phallocentrism
Centered on men or on a male viewpoint, especially one held to entail the domination of women by men.
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enliism

The theory (or doctrine) that the legal reasoning of jurisprudence should be wholly repudiated and thus; rendered non-existent.

i hate legal theory. :c

Labels:


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Saturday, April 26, 2008


Relaxation..


Im out by the heronbank lake...and i just had to make u guys jealous.lolz.

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Wednesday, April 23, 2008


while i was supposed to be studying...

Lol.

this is actually a continuation from the last post..right after I came back from lunch, i ran into my hall and practically dragged my hallmates out for a picnic..so here we all are..the pics are screwed cuz mac is shyte.cant rotate.


our stuff..


with rosieee

and fran...
poser pics;)
dont you wish you were here??:)

there were tons more pics..but theyre all in rosemary's cam..oh well.on facebook later then...well at least i got to picnic in the sun...instead of going to london..which i initially wanted to do..with suebee and darryl who are watching les miserables tonite.peh.well YOU GUYS MISSED OUT ON THE SUN BOO.

right.back to work.o.O

enz

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Im pleased to announce..


..that SPRING has finally*finally*come to warwick.i could walk out of my room today with just a tshirt!!the pweety flowers were out and i just couldnt stop gushing..
..much to the annoyance of zyang who was really hungry..whee!there were people on the grass,munching on apples and reading books..just like hw i imagined uni life would be in england..sigh.now if only i can find someone to layan my madness..n sit with me under the sun..and have a picnic..and run around..haihs.but noo..ive got idiot essays to finish and exams to study for.why do they like to torture students when the weather is so nice?!
I apologize for the weird structure of this post..(if its weird) cz i cnt really see..im blogging from my phone cz im too excited about spprriiinggg...hahahahaha.im in the sun..sucks to all peeps in malaysia..heard its raining every day.lolz.k im going bck to appreciating the scenery now..toodles..

Enzxoxo.

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Monday, April 21, 2008


Of moving in and random singlish words.

:)

moved back into my lovely lovely room in Jack Martin..(after Tocil I will never EVER take JM for granted again..)

haha.i dont know how i managed to collect so much rubbish...i filled three travel bags, one backpack, two handbags, and about four plastic bags and a tiny chest of drawers with all my stuff. imagine lugging the stuff all the way from...er...Tocil..to JM..its like...walking the whole of mv north to south about twice?

and guess who were the victims of my rubbish?

hehe. thats oliver on the right of the pic...and zyang on the left.poor munchkins..not that they were true gentlemen though..complaining all the darn way..haha. they were even more pissed off that i was laughing and giggling throughout the entire process...and that i took my phone out just to snap a pic of them looking utterly ridiculous...you cant see it but zyang's carrying a multi-face multi-colored (ie.gay) bag on the other side...and oliver looked like an overzealous japanese tourist in that stupid hat. oliver chose the longer way because "the other way damn shy la.people can see" hahahahaaaaaa.

ahem.but thank you anyway.:)

spent much of saturday night/sunday morning unpacking (which is a bitch I tell you)..and I used all my cards and random advertisements from spain for my wall:D:D happy is me.heeeheeeheee.nice nice or not???that shirt is from zyang..it says "I Love Morocco". he bought it EXTRA SMALL so i could put it on my wall. o.o didnt understand it till he explained to me..lolz.(maybe he ws just covering the fact that i couldnt fit into it..o.O)

aaaanyways...finally went to tescos with the hallmates...amidst much laughter about singlish (Ro bought the Brit boys a book on singlish) dont know why..of all the things they picked up...they picked up the phrase "bang balls"..so now everything that goes wrong in the kitchen is met with "oh BANG BALLS LAAAH"..

ok i have so totally lost the mood for blogging right now.sigh.im so torn.top b? essay. top b? essay.

aaarrrrgghhhhhhhhhhhh.

oh oh...for all you people who love to procrastinate your work, well if you HAVE to procrastinate, might as well do charity along with it right?

this one's especially for all those people who think that their english is better than anyone else who claims that their's is better.

www.freerice.com

its this vocabulary game thing..and every word you get right earns you 20 grains of rice to be donated to the starving countries...

This is done by the UN ..so dont worry, your time wont be wasted looking at youtube videos and gaining nothing but that momentary, brief respite from the stress of studying (or the stress from NOT studying - like me)..you'll be doing charity..and hopefully God will smile upon you for being so charitable and give you a first class...:D..lol who am i kidding =.= (i earned 5000 grains the last time i played...45 mins straight...)

zomg.

siigghs.top b.?

or not........

its so good to be back in JM with my ensuite.

luccy in the skyyy with diamondsssss......

its a beatles song.dont ask.its been stuck in my head...

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Friday, April 18, 2008


the end of break.

rawr. tis the season to be not jolly.

term 3 starts in 2 days. while im sooooo glad to be back in Jack Martin...I dreeead the exams..

the whole year..(though technically it's just been about 6 months ive been in the UK) has just slipped by...i dont think i learnt anything.seriously.apart from the class called Life, i dont think i picked up any more knowledge on law.pei.

Dont know why we pay so much for an overseas education when it makes us end up in the same position, just like any other type of education: pissing our pants dreading the exams. *sweats*

yeeesh. procrastination is a cancer that ive been trying to cure. I think my one third stage already.beyond hope.thankfully though, 2 of my 3 essays due the friday term begins are done.pheww.

:P

OOH OOH DID YOU KNOW THAT EPISODES OH PCK (PHUA CHU KANG) ARE AVAILABLE ON YOUTUBE!!!!

heh heh. that sitcom brought me up i swear. I remember waay back in std 4 when Hui En was going on and on about this "BAHCHOOKANNG" (that was how she pronounced it) and how her aunt was recording it for her on VCR (youtube and online streaming and DVDs were unheard of then)..

PCK PVT LTD...bestt in singaahpohre and jayybeee...and some saaay BATAAAM..and now ah...even PULAU KETAMM..

teeheehee.

that mole..and the yellow boots..and CHUBS..and aloysius...

*sigh*

Im so old nowwwwwwwww aarghhh. hm i think i shall watch one epi...*just one epi* before i start on bloody asfgh-ing legal theory.pei.

"how much do you love me..?"

"*shows hands* |.................| from here....to here..."

"so littleee!!!??"
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.


"but....the world is only |..| from here to here..."


.:Kisses:.


Spontaneous..


Passionate
Romantic
Sweet
Don't you just love kisses? So romantic *sigh*. The last pic's my fave.:)

Pics from Deviantart.

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Tuesday, April 15, 2008


Coca cola..


Sparkling soft drink with VEGETABLE extracts.

Err..so..it's..healthier?aanyways,just got back frm tesco's..and i hereby declare that im going on a fruit diet!!so help me GOd.
Hmm.im blogging frm my phone at the mo.lets see how this workks..fiddle fiddle..


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Monday, April 14, 2008


My latest "craze"...

so, it's apparently the "talk" of the internet-savvy community back home.

a mix between Big Brother and ANTM....what's so original about it? Akademi Fantasia was a mix of Big Bro and American Idol, and Malaysia's Most Beautiful *kofkoff* remember sheet-take?and hail berry!?*koffkoff* well....nothing original there either...

so tell me why.....why oh why this particular show is different?

I dont know how much of "the talk of the town" it is back home...but...HEH HEH. I'M LOVING IT LA.

Before you froufrou "I watch ANTM from Cycle 1 to 10 and am therefore too superior for this shit" people shout about how horrible it is, let me say one thing..as usual, we malaysians always have to prove ourselves..whether it is by making the longest pandan cake in shape of the malaysian flag, or by sending a space tourist into..well,space...we just have to. it's almost as if it's in our DNA to strive to be the first in something, no matter how insignificant.

What does this show prove, you ask? ....*goes to website and tries to printscreen..wait.*

.......ASDFGH..screw Mac and its inability to printscreen and its non-existent MS Paint.

sigh. ok fine. I shall be boring and tell you what it proves...

......*so super anticlimax I want to die*

Malaysians has once again, made itself proud by producing it's first online reality tv series!!!!*yay throws confetti*

Okay so if you still don't know which show Im talking about, either you're a) not Malaysian *and acceptable excuse* or b) just damn n00b.

Malaysian Dreamgirls!!!!!!

here's the boring introduction, if you would like to read what *i* think, just forward down a little bit..

Malaysian Dreamgirls is an online show where 12 girls are chosen out of the masses, thrown into one house (not as fancy as the ones you see in BigBro or TilaTequila), and are taught the secrets of being a supermodel...Every week a girl is voted out...and the winner gets to be on the front cover of NewMan *malaysia's GQ? i dunno*, a NISSAN LATIO, RM10,000, a NISSAN LATIO, RM3000 worth of haircare stuff from Wella, a NISSAN LATIO, RM1000 worth of Escada fragrances, and...a NISSAN LATIO. The judges are KennySia, ElaineDaly, and LimJimmy.

*end intro*

Okay it's not like Im car-crazy or anything but the nissan latio is what most of the girls are after anyway. It aint like ANTM where girls cry and cry and cry about dreaming to be the world's best supermodel..At the most least you can say that our Malaysian girls are much more realistic about their looks and their capabilities as a supermodel (or lack thereof)..

nyaaaaaaahahahahahahah.Thanks to an idiotic fourth year who's an insomniac, I actually saw one of the first epis..and I was hooked.

Not because it was thaaat great or anything, truth be told, it kinda sucks..but because it has Malaysian Accents GALORE...(I think now you can see how much im missing home..since I usually HATE ahpia, ahlianfied accented English)..and it's sooo fascinating to watch the slow progression of bitchiness in that house.

*ahem*The bitchiness starts when a few of the girls suddenly become quite secretive about the goings-on in the house. Think along the lines of "I just dont like it...when..*pause* some people...don't clean up after themselves you know?.." It's actually quite the pissing off cuz that just makes you want to know who the hell didnt clean up..*stones* zomg maybe that was a gimmick to make ppl stay tuned!!.......naaaah the production team cant be thaaaat creative.

The next episode after someone gets voted off..."Well, we're okay la..it's just that, some people are still here...and then..."*camera goes sepia and zooms in on a few of the contestants* at this point you're like omg just tell me and spill the damn goss already..But NO. nothing gets told, and everyone's basically lalala *I quote Datin Hanis(one of the contestants)* until one day semua belang-belang keluarrr...and that's only in episode 5.

Even then, there arent any confrontations..it's just mainly backstab bitching and long long long bits of posing and posing and posing and posing with weird background music.The funniest parts are when the contestants are allowed their 15 minutes of connection to the outside world. That's the only time where they get to know abit of what the others are saying about them from their parents/friends/whoever they contact.FUIYO..funnyness. Esp Cindy..heralded as queen bitch with her funky accent which comes and goes at will..you kneeowwww.

she launches into bitchcomplaints to her father with "ah pa, ni zhe tao na ge ma lai po....in du po.."*ah pa, you know that MALAYYY WOMAN bla bla bla INDIAN WOMAN...* right in front of the cameraman. committing audience suicide i thought. which person would still vote for her after hearing her underlying racist comments.but....i guess the malaysian audience..is still quite blind.

and then there's Nadia..and the issue about Jeans, and TOMAHTOEEEESS.and swearing.

and there's Fiqa, with her pretty looks and apparently down to earth personality.. *people who know her claim that it's a facade..a front just to endear herself to the audience* Personally I think everyone knows someone like her in high school, the kind that's pretty and nice when she needs something, but isnt genuinely nice..I bet everyone who's reading this has someone in mind.

and there's oh-so-sweet Hanis, who everybody looooves to manja because she's so innocent and n00b about everything.

and there's Jay, the big sis of everyone, nobody has anything bad to say about her. except the audience...everyone says she looks like a MANWHORE. but i dont think so...her angular face makes her different from the rest..unique u know?

and who could forget Ringo, aka Cheesie, a popular blogger who kinda damaged herself because she was initially rejected for the top 12, and got accepted again after one of the contestants dropped out, but not before she wrote a bitter bitter bitter blogpost about how some girls didnt deserve to get in and that the judges had fungus in their eyes...oo..bitch material??apparently not...matter was resolved in one single apology and she has dissappeared into the background ever since.from her blog I find her a very bubbly person and it's sad tht her personality isnt showing through on the show..her legions of fans are keeping her in still.though i dont know what a 5"2 model would do on a catwalk laa...nevermind....if she wins theres more hope for me...:):)

and of course, the reason why i watch the show... Adeline....when the judges asked her how bad she wanted to be a super model..she replied "deee-eeper than mountain...higher than sea" and when she got it she said.."i dont know what to say..i....i....lost..." hahahahahaaa...so funnyy.


hem hem hem.I dont remember the rest...cuz theyre not really worth a mention la you kneeeow.

The three judges dont play any important part..esp kenny..who just goes "ooh look at that..." hahaha...okay maybe it can be said that he's important..because he is the epitome of malaysian men. everytime see hot chick all they know how to say is "ooh look at that" or variations of it.

Jimmy is just very obvious about all the advertising "And girls..what pretty exercise outfits you're wearing..all sponsored by....*waits for response from girls but doesnt get any* by Reebok!!"

Elaine Daly..hm.she doesnt appear in every episode but when she does I see how far away the models are compared to her. and she isnt even that big a supermodel.siiigh.

All in all, a very good show to watch if youre currently procrastinating on something...and need one more nonsensical thing to do in your time of procrastination. I doubt anything productive will come of this. all the models fall short of even the ugliest in ANTM.

As for me, I can't wait till the next episode comes out!!!!

OOH PS: check out cindy's blog for some hot spicy photos of herself...taken by her lil brother....i dont know what to say to that la.i think that's pretty sick and kinky zomg.

OOH OOH.interesting fact: wesleyans! I dont know how many of you know...but our very own prahsanna is in the trailer for Malaysian Dreamgirl..I think she should have been one of the contestants..sure beat the others flat..except her height la sigh...why are we so short la why. watch her here...

PPS: if youre wondering why suddenly im blogging more than usual, it's because procrastination is kicking in. so there will be more crap from me.hehe.

..i need to pee.

TOODLES!

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Sunday, April 13, 2008


when you least expect it.

"Andrew has just signed in"

My heart skipped.

Maybe it's the late nights.

Maybe it's the stress of exams and essays due.

Maybe it's how Ken needed to know how to let go.

I clicked.

Helo??

"Andrew may not receive your message because he or she appears to be offline."

I don't know why I did that.

I guess it's the split second thought.

How abrupt was his departure.

Maybe it's just his auto sign in.

It's funny how a simple sign in sound can shake you up just like that.

I don't know how many of his other friends saw the same thing I did.

Here I am, rushing an assignment. And for once, no Andrew to say "hi enli~! how r u?"

Sigh.

enz

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Friday, April 11, 2008



Why don't you tell her
Why don't you let her see
The feelings that you hide
Cuz she'll never know
If you never show
The way u feel inside

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This comes late..

Andrew: hey enli!

EnLI:erm...hi..who's this again?sorry..

Andrew: haha I just added you la..im andrew..ken's friend..

EnLi: oohhh! hie hie how r u..

Andrew: im ok la..hows packing?youre leaving soon rite?

.........

*mundane talk*

EnLi: omg do u watch football!!

Andrew: yea..haha*talks of some match that had just happened* which is ur fave?

EnLi: erm..im afraid to answer...but..manchester??

Andrew:haha.you should be..good la manchester..if not i don wanna be friends with you already..

EnLi: wth..so u wont be friends with someone if they dont support manchester??==

Andrew: of course lah!!!

*~*~*~*~*~*

That was, I think, the first conversation I had with him online..

After a truly hilarious yumcha session in Old Town Coffee. I remember how surprised the guys were when the food came and hm..i cant remember..but one of them had the curry laksa, and it was so good they shared the next one..Andrew said he'd definitely go back there. And I said, oklar..maybe next time when Ken is back..and Andrew said "Har! So long meh...Sorry ken Im coming without you.."

About 5 hours were spent in that coffee house, laughing about A-Levels maths, and of course, Mr Lim's addmath tuition.Andrew was the sesat one, him being the only one not part of the trio that went. Ken and I were, as usual, bickering about who was better, and Jian Hung *that old sage* was sitting back taking in the praises when Andrew asked "Eh how come Jian Hung not included?"And we both replied "Aiyah,, kenot fight la..hes a nerd!"

That time was the first time I met any of Ken's chums. I remember seeing him around alot, with his HELP group..sitting in Devi's always outside near the trees. The first thing that struck me was that although they were endlessly teasing each other, they never brought the other down. It was all very brotherly. And when it came to exams (I think this was before the HELP result were out) Ken was boasting about how his maths were alot better now and if he sat for our exams he would have gotten the same as Andrew. I laughed and asked Andrew if his maths was really that bad, much to the irritation of Ken. And Andrew, instead of taking the piss (though he laughed along..and this sticking up for his bro came later..after much much laughter)said "Nola..were about the same level..and Im not THAAAT bad...so I think can la..."

That time was the first time I met up with him. And the last.

And I must admit one thing, I thought he was very very cute. Save the short part.Lol.

No, he didn't ask for my number. Hahahaha. A little dissapointed..But it was okay you know? I never thought I'd see him again...little did I know that I really wouldnt..

But when I got home, there was a Facebook request. And a new MSN add..and..of course, I knew who he was when he first talked to me online, even though I pretended I didn't.

If he HAD asked for my number, I think I would have thought differently about him. The guards would have gone up and the alarms would have sounded. But no, Andrew did the "shy guy" thing. Which I found sooooo funny and cute.

I won't say he was special to me then, because he wasn't. He was just some random person I chanced upon. I was so busy with saying goodbye to everyone else that he just slipped my mind completely.

I think the whole world knows that Im not the type to chat online..And whenever he chatted to me, I guess I was rather distant, but he never stopped asking me how I was whenever I was online, and sure, we'd talk, not extensively, just how are yous and all that. Then one day, I didn't get a message from him. Maybe it had been a few days already. A week? March 31st. That day I spared Andrew a second of thought.."Hm...Where is this feller ah.."

Oliver told me about some guy who was in a coma from HELP because he hit his head while gymming. He said I couldn't have known the guy. Andrew he said. I dont remember Andrew as Andrew because I call him midget! ken's fault! I didnt feel anything when Oliver told me that. It was just another *oh sad case*..

A week later, it snowed in Warwick. SPRING!three inches of snow. it started at 2am ish (about 9am in Malaysia) Ive neveer seen it snowed that much before in my life. The next day, I found out that it snowed heavily in LONDON too. I dont know the last time it ever snowed in London man...and then I saw all the MSN names. RIP, I'll miss you Andrew..

And a MSN message from Jian Hung: "Hey Enz, remember the guy that you me and ken went out with?"

He was offline by the time I saw the message. But it clicked. Andrew. Midget. Gone?

Disbelief set in. How could it..Why?

I asked around...IMed Ken about a hundred times. I just needed to know.

It's strange how someone becomes special in their absence. Everything he's ever said, every facial expression of his that you remember, every memory..is just magnified 100 times over.

I doubt everything i remember, because I only have that much memory of him. I remember an impish smile. on a boyish face. I could be wrong. but that's how I remember him. I remember the way he picked up his glass to take a sip from the straw. I remember him wearing shorts. and the slim fit puma-esque shoes he wore. I remember his polo t. his waxed hair.

Ive read so many stories, memories, of him...and mine falls way short. Everyone who was close to him would say "I dont know what to say, there were too many memories.."

I can say "I dont have much to say, but I have one memory. And one memory I will treasure, because he was the first of my peers to leave this world."

Andrew, you're an idiot. Why did you do that stupid workout. Why. Not buff enough issit. I wish I had told you how much I liked your smile. If I knew that this would have happened, I wouldnt have told you to go to the gym more so you can buff up and all the girls will love you. I would have said that you dont need that; Youve got the smile..the eyes..and the heart. I would have told you how much I hate people going to CC so late into the night. And how people can die of exhaustion if they CC so much *not to mention the stoned look they have on their faces*.Maybe you would have gone anyway. But I wish I did nevertheless. I wish I kept in touch with Ken more. Then maybe I would have met you earlier, and got to experience abit of that special bond that you have with everyone. Oh wait...I already do have that..

I owe you a facebook wall post.No, actually you do. Remember that midg? How we were so childish.. I should have done it then, at least I knew you'd reply. But now you never will.

I can't bring myself to do it. Everyone else has so many memories of you. They can write millions of facebook wall posts and they still wouldnt run out of things to remember you by. Ive only got a fraction of what theyve got. I wish I remembered to see you in Dec when I got back, again, everything else just came up..before you..like I said, you weren't special to me then..and if you were alive now, I doubt I would have talked to u any more than I did...

What can I say..

Andrew, Ill miss your "Hi enli!"s.

And hopefully the Red Devils will win this year.

Have fun up there. I know you will.Say hi to Jesus for me.

Thank you for teaching me, waking me up.

Life is fragile.

everyday you wake up could be your last. Just like how he probably rolled out of bed after less than 2 hours sleep to go and play futsal and go gym after a night of CC-ing. Did he know?

The last time he opened the gates of his house to go out, the last time he took off his sweaty football jersey..the last time he ate his fave tandoori chicken..the last time...

He didnt know it was his last.

I know this lesson of yours to me probably wont stick, and I will forget that I should treasure everything like it was the last thing I would do...

And guess what midg!! I will give you that facebook wall post sheesh YOU win.:)

I'll see you again. And when I do you better still remember me. And REPLY MY DARN FBOOK WALL POST.

enz.

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::Oceanus::
EnLi.
19.
complicated is synonymous.
so NOT the prim and proper lady.
chocolates and crisps<3.
on the brink of a new chapter in life
and you're coming with me:)



::On the sea::

It keeps eternal whisperings around
Desolate shores, and with its mighty swell
Gluts twice ten thousand Caverns, till the spell
Of Hecate leaves them their old shadowy sound.
Often 'tis in such gentle temper found,
That scarcely will the very smallest shell
Be mov'd for days from where it sometime fell,
When last the winds of Heaven were unbound.
Oh ye! who have your eye-balls vex'd and tir'd,
Feast them upon the wideness of the Sea;
Oh ye! whose ears are dinn'd with uproar rude,
Or fed too much with cloying melody -
Sit ye near some old Cavern's Mouth, and brood
Until ye start, as if the sea-nymphs quir'd!
- John Keats


::Sea Breeze::



::Precious Corals::

::Other Seas::

*lipeng the other princess
*saran the hot onion
*melly STILL the emoqueen
*darling sukyein
*ben the "best" DJ in Malacca:)
*12+1
*shaun the mango
*tall ian:)
*tzins:)
*sammie the teletubby
*visionary sueebee



::seashores::

the end of the beginning...?
What I learnt today...
another sheepish post..
*sheepish*
Happily Never After...
happy birthday to blueseasblueskies!
memories...
Sorry SueBee. I am Very Slow. And an Insomniac.
the forehead, nose and lips.
this is going to be a post full of self-pity.


::the Deep Blue Sea::
August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 December 2008 March 2009 May 2009 June 2009 October 2009